Author: Pat Liberty

The tailgate and its impact on my life continue to be my teacher. I share these thoughts not because I am looking for sympathy or pity, but to provide an opportunity for reflection when you are in contact with people who are ill or injured.

Lesson One: I look the way I look. Pain has a way of leaking out of every pore of my body. My eyes are dull and all the color is drained from my face. My movements are jerky and contort my face because they cause more pain. My wardrobe selections have deteriorated significantly. Getting dressed takes most of the energy I have. Today I am sporting an oversized T-shirt from a University of Rhode Island Women’s Basketball tournament. It is complimented by a pair of shabby workout shorts. They are testimony to the time when working out was actually an option. My haute couture is topped off with my favorite flip flops which bare my unpedicured toes. I haven’t had a haircut in four months. There isn’t enough product in the world to make my hair look decent. It is way too much work to put on makeup. I just accept the fact that I look like a cross between Phyllis Diller and the Ghost of Christmas past. I just have to deal with it. So do the people who come to visit.

Lesson Number Two: Recovery is not a straight line from the wheelchair to the marathon race. As someone who is almost pathologically impatient, this is a tough one. I am learning that one step forward and two steps back is the rhythm of recovery. I am still learning what is too much to do by being on the other side of doing too much and paying the price. It is one part impatience and one part stubbornness. There is a lot of waiting around in recovering from this injury. There is so much that needs to be done around the house and around the boat. The collision of the two threatens to make me crazy. I am painfully and slowly learning the art of patience.

Lesson Number Three: It is what it is. Yes, that is a hackneyed overused statement. It happens, however, to be true. There is nothing I can do to change the situation I am in. So, accepting what is remains the task at hand. Acceptance is not an event, it is a process. Like recovery, it is one step forward and two steps back at times.

Lesson Number Four:  Crutches are a pain in the ass. Across my lifespan, I have spent years on crutches. I still have the original wood crutches I received in junior high school after my first knee surgery. The crutches I now have are accented by a shelf to hold my forearm and take the pressure off my broken wrist. This makes the crutches quite unwieldy. They regularly crash to the ground if I try and stand them up. They are the perfect obstacle for someone to trip over when navigating around the house. Right now, however, they are my partner in recovery. I can get up out of the wheelchair and walk around a little. Once again, the goal of recovery tempers the inconveniences of the process.

Lesson Five: I welcome people’s concern, prayers and care. I believe I have remained sane for the last year because of the prayers that are offered on my behalf. Many churches and many people have held me in the gentle embrace of prayer. I feel their love and compassion as I face the challenges of each day. The most helpful prayers are those that ask that I be aware of God’s presence; prayers that I will feel the love and support of people around me; and prayers that I may rely on the Divine for patience and perseverance as this recovery ambles on at glacial pace. Prayer is the real deal, in case you were wondering.  

Lesson Six: These months hold their own gifts and graces. Inasmuch as the tailgate continues to be my teacher, these months of recovery provide the blank pages where I get to write what I am learning. I continue to be amazed at the generosity and compassion of people in our lives. We are blessed with a network that weaves a web of love and support around us in ways I never could have imagined. They are a genuine community, filled with authentic people who are just being who they are and doing what they do. They are embodiments of grace.

I have always believed in the power of community. My first sermon forty-five years ago was entitled Covenant, Community and Commitment. My passion for and commitment to community has grown stronger over these past decades. Churches have taught me what it means to be community. In these months of recovery my friends have taught me once again the value of community. I think it’s the way we are supposed to live in the world.

Maybe you are beyond your childbearing years. Perhaps you made the decision to not have children, and the birth control method you used worked for you. Maybe you are a man. There are a hundred reasons to make the demise of Roe v. Wade not your issue.

And you are wrong. It is your issue.

It is your issue because:

• What happens when your fifteen year old daughter comes home pregnant?
• What happens when your wife is sexually assaulted by a stranger and becomes pregnant?
• What happens if prenatal care shows that your baby has multiple birth defects and is destined to live a very short life filled with pain?
• What happens when it touches your life? Oh, that’s right it isn’t your issue, at least until it is.

And lest you think these are hypotheticals only, last week a ten year old girl was raped and became pregnant. She had to go to another state to obtain an abortion. This is seriously messed up (for so many reasons).

This is everyone’s issue because this decision is the top of a very slippery slope. Some have called the decision to overturn Roe v. Wade a judicial coup. The Court has exposed itself as willing to pander to the right, a tendency toward which they have been leaning for some time. They have lost their objectivity and a whole lot of their credibility. Their decisions are eroding the barrier between church and state that are spelled out in the Constitution.  

While everyone was agog over Roe v. Wade, the Court also ruled that public monies can be used for private religious schools. The case from the state of Maine had to do with a rural town that had no public school, but had a religious school.  Most of the “religious” schools are conservative Christian schools.  Will this school allow children to NOT participate in the religious education that is part and parcel to these schools? What happens to the Jewish or Muslim student who lives in the town? Will they pay for him/her to attend another school that will not inculcate its religious beliefs? Would the same ruling have been made if it were a Jewish school? I think not.  

In another troubling decision, the Court also ruled that a coach can pray with his team at the fifty yard line following a football game. First, it assumes that God gives a rat’s patoot about who wins a high school football game. It is quite suspect in my opinion. Second, the larger issue with this case is that the student/coach relationship is a “power over” relationship. Coaches are powerful and influential figures in the lives of teenagers. Does a student athlete REALLY feel free to not participate? There is the very real possibility of subtle coercion to gain the approval of the coach and his/her teammates. Or student athletes may feel subtly pressured to participate in order to curry the coach’s favor for increased playing time or better recommendation letters for college.

We are in a dangerous time. The United States was never meant to be a theocracy. It was crafted as a republic and a democracy. If the fundamental christians can influence public policies that affect all people, we are a lot further down that slippery slope than we might imagine.

These three decisions in the aggregate further blur the line between the separation of church and state. The problem is that the religious freedom protected here is only the “christian” church, and I use the word very loosely. I sincerely doubt the same freedoms would be so readily extended to different religious expressions. And I can only imagine people would be up in arms.

Make no mistake, these are precedent setting cases. We will see more cases coming before the Supreme Court. We likely will see rulings in favor of religious institutions. These cases, taken together, open the door for coercive religious practices to be foisted on all people, regardless of their religious affiliation.  

Another troubling aspect of these decisions is that it opens the door to look at other civil rights issues. Clarence Thomas has suggested revisiting other landmark cases. Using the same logic regarding it not being in the Constitution, Thomas sees a loophole to roll back civil rights cases, including (ironically) his right to marry his wife. Same sex marriage may well be on the chopping block as well as civil rights protections for LGBTQ persons. There will be devastating consequences.

As one of the three main branches of government, the Supreme Court is the keeper of the Constitution. The subtext of that truth for our time is that the conservative Federalist Society poured millions of dollars into the nominations of the three conservative justices rammed through by the occupant. To be an “originalist” in regard to the constitution means that a bunch of old white men decided what was going to be law over two hundred years ago in a very different time and a very different world. I would like to think that human society evolves and uses the basic premise of “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” for all people. Instead they are cherry picking parts of the constitution to pander to the religious right. Religious conservatives and the originalists are conspiring to roll back civil rights at least fifty years. What they fail to see is that there are overarching perspectives that should inform their actions. These are justice for all people, a concern for the whole of the human community and creation.

If you’re not outraged, you’re not paying attention.

People, it is time to organize, cooperate and reach out to like-minded allies. This is NOT the time to be individual heroes and/or have one person doing what a hundred other people are doing.

It is time to recreate the Underground Railroad. The History site gives helpful information on the Underground Railroad. You can read about it here: https://www.history.com/topics/black-history/underground-railroad Most of us know the name Harriet Tubman, but there were hundreds of others. Their names are lost to history but they were a crucial part of the movement.

The Underground Railroad grew out of the conviction that no person had the right to own another person.

If a new movement is to provide the network women will need, we have to get our convictions straight. If you are a person of faith, you have to get your beliefs straight. The only way coordinated efforts that reach to every corner of the country will get off the ground is through one committed person at a time. Margaret Mead wrote, “Never doubt that a small committed group of people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” This is no time for handwringing and feelings of desperation. This is a time to organize, speak out, protest and be counted.

Here are some points for consideration:

• The government has a long history of affirming individual freedom: “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” The government can assume no authority over women’s bodies. Women have autonomy to decide what is best for them. To deny this because it is not explicitly mentioned in the constitution is absurd. Driver’s licenses and car registrations aren’t mentioned either, but you can go to jail if you don’t have them.
• I believe this action by the part of the Not-So-Supreme-Court prevents me from practicing my faith in the way I see fit.
  • I believe God created us with free will, the capacity to choose and the moral agency to make decisions about our own lives. John Pavlovitz has a compelling argument about God being Pro-Choice. You can read it here: https://johnpavlovitz.com/2020/10/15/god-is-pro-choice/
  • We need people of faith to speak long and loud to shift the dominant narrative of the religious fanatics and make known an alternate position grounded in faith in a just God. We need an out-there-in-your-face witness to an alternate narrative that has its own validity and dignity.
  • We need courageous preachers to address these issues from the pulpit and put petitions out for people to sign at coffee hour. Ask your pastor to preach on this issue. If needed, I will send a ready-to-preach sermon that can be used in various settings, as long as proper citation is given. If s/he feels unable to address this from the pulpit, please comment on the blog site. I will preach for free in your church (CT, MA and RI) beginning in September. The joy of being a supply preacher is that you don’t have to care if you piss people off. The gospel is the gospel and sometimes it pisses people off. I’m good with that.
  • We need courageous preachers to help end the shame and stigma that women feel terminating a pregnancy. There are women in just about every church in this country who have terminated a pregnancy. Whether last week or twenty years ago, they are in need of care and freedom from stigma.
  • We need clergy to use the authority of their office and write letters to the editor.
  • We all need to stand up and be counted in our convictions.
• Associate Justices obfuscated or outright lied about their opinions on Roe v. Wade and how they would vote. Is there no repercussion or accountability for them?
• Write to the Justices. Thank those who voted to uphold Row v. Wade and castigate the justices who outright lied in their confirmation hearings. Call them to account for making the decision to strip women of their moral agency.
• Women of means will always have access to reproductive health care. This decision disproportionately affects low income women and women of color. The overturning of Roe v. Wade is first and foremost a justice issue.

The truth is I have no idea how to organize an underground railroad, but I do know this. If Harriet Tubman did it with no phones and no internet, we should be able to figure it out. There already are networks in place. This is no time to reinvent the wheel. Contact your local Planned Parenthood agency and find out how you can help.

Please share this blog on your Facebook page or forward it to your e-mail list. Leave a comment on my blog site. Comments are moderated. Obscene and disparaging comments will be removed. Let’s make this go viral and mobilize!

This is a time to be part of the solution.  

New York Times: “Dog feeding stations in bombed out cities in Ukraine.”

New York Times: “We buried him and kept on walking.”

Evening Network   News: (after the Uvalde massacre) “When the families finish grieving…”

We live in a world of sixty second sound bites and headlines followed by three hundred word articles. We live in a theater of the short attention span.

What is left out of these headlines and sound bites is far more important.

It’s hard to fathom leaving behind a beloved pet knowing you are condemning them to almost certain death. It’s harder to imagine burying your child, who died of starvation, beside the road and continue walking to escape the famine in Somalia. It’s impossible to fathom an end-date to grief, as if it can be scheduled a week from next Tuesday.

To make matters worse, the next day these headlines are gone. The headlines have changed and the sixty second sound bites are different. We are confronted with the Senate hearings on the insurrection. We are on to the twenty massacres that have happened since Uvalde. Just in case you are wondering, a mass shooting is any gun event that involves four or more deaths/injuries not including the gunman.

It is tempting to just tune out the barrage of pain that is the daily fare of news. There is, at least for me, a fear of being swallowed alive. There is also the tendency to think it will never happen “here” wherever “here” happens to be for you. I can’t begin to imagine Russian warships coming into Narragansett Bay under the Newport Bridge. I can’t fathom that any of the hundreds of schools in my state are just as vulnerable as the schools where massacres have occurred. And, let’s be honest, there is a part of us that is grateful not to be in their shoes.

It’s a challenge to stay engaged in the world and hold on to our sanity. The key is holding on to both. We can’t hold on to one at the expense of the other. We have to keep our equilibrium and stay connected to what is happening in the world. Otherwise, we become hollow shells of human beings. In truth, we are always moving back and forth between the shores of the deep end of the world’s pain and the more immediate gifts and graces of our own lives.

The great poet Kahlil Gibran, influenced by both Christianity and the Sufi tradition of Islam, wrote about joy and sorrow as essentially two sides of the same coin. In his seminal work, The Prophet he writes,

            “Joy is your sorrow unmasked. The deeper that sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain…. When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart and you shall see that in truth, you are weeping for that which has been your delight…. Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy. Only when you are empty are you at a standstill and balanced.”

Holding sorrow and joy in mutually informative tension, as uncomfortable as it is, allows us to build emotional capacity for compassion without giving into despair. To live in this world is to experience constant emotional whiplash. It’s what it means to be a citizen of the world.

We cannot insulate ourselves from the world’s pain. The starvation and displacement of millions of people SHOULD break our hearts. “We buried him and kept on walking.” Neither should we insulate ourselves from the things that bring us joy, or feel guilty for feeling joy while so much of the world is a hot mess.

Looking beyond the sound bites and headlines, imagining that we are in their shoes and feeling something of the pain of others is what can spur us to action. Moving back and forth between the shores of joy and sorrow, seeing them as two sides of the same coin, helps us be engaged citizens of a troubled, beautiful, broken and  miraculous world.

As recovery stretches into the second year I am still (reluctantly) learning. Truth be told, I’m tired of learning from experience. I would much rather get the information reading a book. If only it worked that way.

Here are a few more lessons from the tailgate.

Lesson One: Never underestimate the power of adult coloring. It started when a friend and colleague gave me a swear word coloring book after the first accident. It was a perfect way to express my frustration. I also had friends who were going through difficult times. I tore out the better pages and put them in the mail with a note. There was something very satisfying about coloring what was on my mind without actually saying it.

Since then, a variety of coloring books have provided meditation, something to focus on besides my aches and pains as well as a way to quell the boredom. I am a voracious reader but reading lost its appeal when the pain meds caused me to read the same paragraph six times and still have no idea what it said.

Coloring also makes me think a lot about my mom. She was an amazing artist. As I choose the colors for my pictures, I like to think I am channeling some of her eye for color. Thinking about mom is always a good thing.

Lesson Two: Friendship is free. It’s a good thing because I never could afford the ones I have. Their love, support, prayers, funny cards and words of encouragement keep me off the pity pot. They help me laugh at my own klutziness.

Listening to those who know me, almost as well I know myself, helped me make the difficult decision to sell my beloved boat Genesis. As friends often do, they lovingly hold up a mirror so I can see myself more honestly.

Lesson Three: I can’t do what I did in my twenties. It really pisses me off. And yet, when I get through griping about it I can see the gifts of aging coming into clearer focus. There are things that are happening in my sixties that couldn’t happen in my twenties. Each season of life brings its own gifts and graces. Stay tuned on this one, I am still working it out.

Lesson Four: TV really is a vast wasteland. It’s amazing how much garbage there is on television. I find myself drawn to reruns of old shows that make me laugh. I spend entirely too much time on whodunit shows. There is something satisfying about having a complex problem solved in forty-six minutes. Still, so much of it is hokey, phony and boring. I guess it is its own wasteland. Netflix and Amazon Prime, however, keep me off prime time and that is a very good thing.

Lesson Five: Time is precious. I have lived far more of my life than I have remaining before me. It is at once humbling and compelling. Time is a gift to use wisely. Tomorrow is promised to no one. Years of working in hospice and palliative care taught me that aging is a privilege denied to many. I am learning to treasure my days and the people who are part of them.

Lesson Six: John Lennon said, “Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” Sometimes it’s tempting to be disappointed in the life I have in comparison to the life I dreamed for myself. Learning to live the life I have and making it my best life is a daily decision. I have made loads of plans and end up living a very different life. And it is just fine. I’m no Pollyanna and sometimes I’m not even a glass half-full kind of person. I’m learning to be the kind of person, where, if the water doesn’t fit in the glass, I get a different glass. It keeps me from comparing what I don’t have in relation to what I expected. It’s a good daily discipline.

Lesson Seven: Dosing myself on the news is a survival strategy. I can only take so much. Some days I read the paper, other days I watch the news. I rarely do both. EB White said, “I rise each morning torn between a desire to save the world and a desire to savor the world. It makes it difficult to plan the day.” Moving back and forth between the shores of saving and savoring keeps me grounded while not allowing me to sink into despair. Too much news is a recipe for depression. Too little news and I risk becoming a clueless shell of a person who is too much concerned with the small purview of my own life.

Lesson Eight: I am reminded of the closing line of the Desiderata (as true now as it was when first written in 1927) “With all its sham drudgery and broken dreams it is still a beautiful world.” I can see it, even while lying on my back staring at the ceiling.

So far, in 2022, there have been over 200 mass shootings. Lots of people are playing the old saw of “thoughts and prayers.” It seems to be code language for doing nothing. This isn’t only true of politicians, though it is hard to take their one-handed prayers seriously when their other hand is in the pocket of the NRA.

Around the country prayer vigils are bringing thousands of people together who are genuinely broken hearted about gun violence AND feel completely powerless to do anything about it. What is missing is a courageous, prophetic voice that speaks out and connects faith and action. What is lacking is a thoughtful, prayerful, biblically informed voice. Such a voice empowers people to push through hand wringing and inaction to passionate faith based proclamation. As Walter Brueggemann writes again and again, capturing the religious imagination of God’s people to envision a world where God’s realm is possible is what inspires us to faithfulness and cajoles us into action.

Here is my modest attempt to set a framework for prophetic witness that can empower us to act with courage and conviction. In our time the loudest voice dominates the airwaves. It is beyond time to take our collective place in giving that dominant voice a run for its money.

1. From Genesis to Revelation the overarching message of scripture is God’s eternal love affair with humanity and all creation. This love is unconditional; we can do nothing to earn it and we can do nothing to lose it.
2. Actions have consequences. God doesn’t change. God does, however, expect us to change. Such change is the lifetime journey of faithfulness and obedience that lies at the heart of discipleship and courageous witness.
3. The life of faithfulness is lived as a grateful response to the steadfast love, forgiveness, mercy and grace of God. We strive to do the will of God out of our love for God, not out of guilt, shame or any of the religious BS the church has dumped on people through the centuries.
4. God is just. This is enough to make all of us quiver in our boots. On the heels of this we also remember that God is merciful. Counting on God’s mercy to absolve us from action, however, doesn’t cut it.
5. The prophetic witness depends on us knowing enough about scripture, history and tradition to say something intelligent. Faithfulness is not a spectator sport. It expects something of us.
6. Genuine community (whether inside a church or not) is essential to a life of faithfulness. We need one another for encouragement, accountability and solidarity. Being a prophetic voice is a lonely task made less lonely through a genuine community.
7. Contrary to popular belief, prophets didn’t predict the future. They were not snake oil peddlers and soothsayers. They were ordinary people who heard a call to speak God’s truth to power.
8. The gospel is political. Get used to it. Sure, people will get mad. Some people may leave. Wish them well. Scripture bears witness to a preferential option for the poor and an overarching goal of justice, peace and equality. Jesus wasn’t crucified between two thieves for bouncing children on his knee. He was put to death because he dared to call out the collusion between the Roman occupation and the corrupt religious power of his day.
9. Religious institutions need to reclaim the practice of admonishment. This is not to be confused with shaming. It means to warn or reprimand firmly. These days the church is not so much in danger of being persecuted as it is of being ignored. The lack of courage and prophetic witness has put the church on the cutting edge of obsolescence. If the church can’t get its witness together to challenge the ills of our time, this is precisely where it belongs.

 There is a need to reclaim the prophetic tradition of our faith communities. Drowning out right wing religious voices that feed religious nationalism, obstruct gospel values and ramp back civil and human rights for marginalized populations depend on us finding our voice.

All of the Abrahamic traditions, Christianity, Judaism and Islam have peace at their core. At the very least every church, synagogue and mosque needs to have letters to legislators who take money from the NRA or obstructed common sense gun reform. Religious institutions need to take a stand. Our broken heartedness is in desperate need of a shot in the arm of prophetic urgency that speaks truth to power and takes the risk of being unpopular. We need to take our broken heartedness and feelings of powerlessness to the voting booth and participate in the democratic process (while we still have one). Being a person of faith asks something of us. It is high time we respond while there is still time.

Ghosting: (verb) the act of cutting off all communication without explanation. It can happen in any relationship and across all social platforms.

Ghosting is a relatively new term that describes what happens when one is abandoned by an individual or a group. It happens in dating relationships, where after two or three dates one person suddenly stops returning phone calls, texts or emails. Ghosting happens in friendships when one person cuts off all communication without a word of explanation. Ghosting is an action on the part of one party that can leave the other party hurt and bewildered.

Ghosting also happens in organizations. My focus here is the church because it is the one I know best (though after a lifetime of church participation and ministry there is still much about the church that is a mystery). Ghosting happens in a variety of circumstances and for a variety of reasons. For example:

• People who ask questions that make church members or leaders uncomfortable. In this instance the person is shunned and frozen out of the fellowship. Their efforts to participate are received with the clear message they are no longer welcome.
• People who have a change in life circumstances. People stop coming to church for all kinds of reasons, e.g. changing health or being pissed off at someone for some reason. When someone suddenly stops coming to church, being ghosted by the community adds insult to injury. It’s like becoming invisible.
• People who don’t dress right or smell right. They don’t fit the image the church has of itself. Therefore, these individuals are not welcomed; no one talks to them at coffee hour, invites them to participate in church activities or calls them during the week. They are ghosted while they are showing up.
• People who are in grief. It’s hard for many to come to church when they are grieving. People are uncomfortable coming to church and crying. Being away during acute grief can turn into permanent lack of participation, especially when they are ghosted by the community.
• People who are getting divorced. In most instances divorce means the church will side with one party and the other one is ghosted. This happened to me during my divorce. After twenty years of membership, I received no phone calls, no cards, no visits, no “hey how are you doing?” In the few instances I went to church I never knew who would talk to me and who wouldn’t. I was totally ghosted by the community I served, supported and loved. In the space of five years, I ended a marriage that was not good for me, lost my home, lost my health, had to leave a job and a career I loved and lost my mother. Complete silence. Not a single, solitary word. It remains one of the most painful times in my life.

The apostle Paul wrote to the church in Galatia (chapter 4, selected verses) about what it means to be a community:

“I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one spirit, just as you were called to the one hope of your calling, one Lord, one faith, one baptism.…”

The church calls us to a new reality that is beyond ourselves, our petty grievances, misunderstandings and wardrobe failures. The church is great at ghosting people who are hurt, pissed off, grieving, going through life upheavals or just don’t fit in. When people are ghosted they are left alone in their sadness, anger and pain. In addition, the community is deprived of the unique skills and gifts that person brings to the life of the church.  

We are called to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. This translates to practical, caring outreach and a willingness to listen, even when it makes us uncomfortable. It means we receive information from those who would otherwise be ghosted and hear what they have to say. It’s not rocket science; it’s simple compassion, grace, and embodying what it means to be the body of Christ.

In the first half of 2019 (the most recent year statistics were available), many politicians took money from the NRA. Some of the amounts seem insignificant, but remember that money buys loyalty. It is a given that getting re-elected is more important than serving the needs of constituents.

The NRA is the most powerful lobby in the United States. Legislators throughout the land bow to their agenda. The NRA spends more money lobbying than any other group. In 2019 alone the NRA spent $1.6 million lobbying congress to assure their agenda remains front and center.

It’s time to vote them out. If you live in a state where your legislator takes money from the NRA vote against them, even if they represent some other issues with which you agree. Remember politicians spread their “priorities” among the issues that will curry the most favor with voters. It’s all very strategic. If you really care about gun control, it’s time to set some of your own agenda aside and vote against those who are in the pocket of the NRA.

Many thanks to the Brady Foundation for compiling the following table; it shows the senators who have received money from the NRA as well as the average number of gun deaths in their state. A link is embedded so you can tweet them your outrage.

Senator	NRA Donations	Gun Deaths in State (per year)
Mitt Romney (UT)	$13,647,676	365	Tweet Them
Richard Burr (NC)	$6,987,380	1,311	Tweet Them
Roy Blunt (MO)	$4,555,722	1,074	Tweet Them
Thom Tillis (NC)	$4,421,333	1,311	Tweet Them
Cory Gardner (CO)	$3,939,199	715	Tweet Them
Marco Rubio (FL)	$3,303,355	2,568	Tweet Them
Joni Ernst (IA)	$3,124,773	264	Tweet Them
Rob Portman (OH)	$3,063,327	1,402	Tweet Them
Todd C. Young (IN)	$2,897,582	907	Tweet Them
Bill Cassidy (LA)	$2,867,074	946	Tweet Them
David Perdue (GA)	$2,002,462	1,459	Tweet Them
Tom Cotton (AR)	$1,968,714	534	Tweet Them
Pat Roberts (KS)	$1,581,153	368	Tweet Them
Pat Toomey (PA)	$1,475,448	1,503	Tweet Them
Josh Hawley (MO)	$1,391,548	1,074	Tweet Them
Marsha Blackburn (TN)	$1,306,130	1,103	Tweet Them
Ronald Harold “Ron” Johnson (WI)	$1,269,486	592	Tweet Them
Mitch McConnell (KY)	$1,267,139	690	Tweet Them
Mike Braun (IN)	$1,249,967	907	Tweet Them
John Thune (SD)	$638,942	95	Tweet Them
Shelley Moore Capito (WV)	$341,738	305	Tweet Them
Martha McSally (AZ)	$303,853	1,013	Tweet Them
Richard Shelby (AL)	$258,514	961	Tweet Them
Chuck Grassley (IA)	$226,007	264	Tweet Them
John Neely Kennedy (LA)	$215,788	946	Tweet Them
Ted Cruz (TX)	$176,274	3,139	Tweet Them
Lisa Murkowski (AK)	$146,262	165	Tweet Them
Johnny Isakson (GA)	$131,571	1,459	Tweet Them
Steve Daines (MT)	$123,711	197	Tweet Them
Cindy Hyde-Smith (MS)	$109,547	576	Tweet Them
Roger Wicker (MS)	$106,680	576	Tweet Them
Rand Paul (KY)	$104,456	690	Tweet Them
Mike Rounds (SD)	$95,049	95	Tweet Them
John Boozman (AR)	$82,352	534	Tweet Them
John Cornyn (TX)	$78,945	3,139	Tweet Them
Ben Sasse (NE)	$68,623	169	Tweet Them
Jim Inhofe (OK)	$66,758	679	Tweet Them
Lindsey Graham (SC)	$55,961	829	Tweet Them
Mike Crapo (ID)	$55,039	242	Tweet Them
Jerry Moran (KS)	$34,718	368	Tweet Them
John Barrasso (WY)	$26,989	104	Tweet Them
Lamar Alexander (TN)	$25,293	1,103	Tweet Them
Mike Enzi (WY)	$24,722	104	Tweet Them
John Hoeven (ND)	$22,050	93	Tweet Them
Susan Collins (ME)	$19,800	146	Tweet Them
Deb Fischer (NE)	$19,638	169	Tweet Them
James Lankford (OK)	$18,955	679	Tweet Them
Jim Risch (ID)	$18,850	242	Tweet Them
Tim Scott (SC)	$18,513	829	Tweet Them
Kevin Cramer (ND)	$13,255	93	Tweet Them

Our social response to mass shootings is to send thoughts and prayers. It is code language for doing nothing. Genuine prayer is that which leads us to action. There have been over 200 mass shootings in the United States this year alone. The cultural response of thoughts and prayers doesn’t cut it.  

As Miroslav Wolf said, “it is deeply hypocritical to pray for something you have no intention of changing.”

It’s good to be back after a few weeks’ hiatus. As many of you know, about a year ago I tripped off the tailgate of my truck and broke both my legs. It’s been a long recovery, and recently it was interrupted by a fall off a ladder while working on my boat. As a result of this most recent klutziness I fractured my pelvis in five places and broke my wrist. Having a lot of time on my hands occasions reflection, so from time to time I will share my musings in posts called “Lessons from the Tailgate.”

Lesson One: Don’t fall off the tailgate (or ladder). You break stuff and it really hurts.

Lesson Two: As you age it takes a lot longer to recover from the stuff you break.

Lesson Three: The pendulum on opioid use has swung too far in the other direction. Asking for pain medication makes most health care providers look at you like a drug-seeking derelict.

Lesson Four: My recovery is a process. If one more person talks about it as a “journey,” they better provide plane tickets.

Lesson Five: It’s not helpful to hear someone say, “God never gives you more than you can handle.” I try and remember, however, that they are doing the best they can.  

Lesson Six: Needing help is a humbling thing. In reality, we are all one trip away from needing help with everything from feeding ourselves to bathing.

Most of the time we delude ourselves with images of self-sufficiency and strength. These are fleeting gifts we can lose in the blink of an eye. I have learned that needing help occasions grace and it teaches me about what it means to be human. When I tripped off the tail gate, my calls for help were answered by at least a dozen neighbors who called the rescue, called Jean, stayed with me and comforted me while I waited for help. From the hospital to rehab to home care, I was treated with respect and care. I am very grateful.

Since then I have continued to need help with rides to the doctor, meal preparation, mobility and so much more. I am blessed with a wonderful physical therapist named Sylvie and with the gift of a loving companion named Jean. My dearest friends have bolstered my spirits and sat with me in dark places. My family has offered unconditional support and love. Churches have, and still are, praying for me. Their prayers have buoyed me through challenging days. In the midst of the difficulties of this past year, I count it all as blessing.

Lesson Seven: Beyond asking for help, there is a lesson in vulnerability.

By vulnerability I mean having fewer resources than someone else. It has nothing to do with weakness, ineptness or anything negative. It simply means that at one point or another we will have fewer resources than another person or people around us. Wrapping my brain around my vulnerability was one hell of an inner fight. I am used to being the one with more resources. I am used to being in control. I am used to being the smart one, the strong one, the (fill in the blank). Of course it is all delusion, but it helps me get through the day. My delusion was tossed into a roiling sea of need and vulnerability. I did not go easily or willingly. I could have skipped it and remained grateful, if not a little irritated that I needed so much help, all the while chomping at the bit to get back to my delusion of self-sufficiency.

Instead, I let myself be dragged to the moment and whatever insight came next. Turns out what came next were moments of grace. To feel at a very deep level what it means to be utterly dependent on someone to help me dress, bring me to the toilet, wipe by butt, and be confined to a wheelchair brought me face to face with my deep vulnerability. I was completely dependent. It was a surreal experience to sit naked on the toilet while a wonderful aide named Lucy washed my back and put on lotion. In the midst of her ministrations we talked about faith and how it sustains us in difficult times. Her professionalism and competence held my vulnerability with trust and compassion. She could have hit me on the head with a bed pan and I would have been powerless to do anything. Instead she treated me with dignity and respect. Those moments of intimate care were occasions of deep pondering and profound grace.

My vulnerability was temporary. There are those for whom it is permanent. Having fewer resources means having less power in ways like physical limitation, being subject to oppressive authority, being profiled because of the color of your skin or the distinctive clothing you wear in faithfulness to your religion. Sometimes there is vulnerability due to age, mental capacity or financial resources. There are so many ways to be vulnerable and each one presents an opportunity for compassionate care.

Our shared humanness means that at times we will be called to hold the vulnerabilities of others in trust and with compassion. It means we will be the ones, from time to time, who are vulnerable and in need. And in those moments we hope there will be those who hold our vulnerabilities with trust and care. Being human is an eternal movement between the shores of strength and vulnerability.  If you’re anything like me, you go to the land of vulnerability kicking and screaming. Yet, on the other side of my delusion of self-sufficiency I discovered a land of deeper shared humanity that is itself a state of grace.

Many of us know that Palm Sunday is the parade that welcomed Jesus into the city of Jerusalem. People spread their coats and palm fronds on the road and sang, “Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!” But long before Jesus ever set foot toward the city of Jerusalem for Passover, the most important journey of his life was well underway.  And his feet never moved. 

It was a journey nurtured in silence, a path discovered through listening.  It was the journey inward…to that place that was not a place, but grounded all other places.  This journey kept Jesus doing what he was supposed to do and kept him doing it even when it ceased to be popular. This inner journey gave him the fortitude and clarity to remain undeterred. 

It is no coincidence that Jesus’ entry into Jerusalem coincided with the celebration of Passover.  Passover is all about freedom from bondage.  It is the celebration that marks the Exodus and the end of slavery in Egypt at the hands of Pharaoh.  Like all Jews who were physically able to make the trip, Jesus and his friends made their pilgrimage to Jerusalem for the celebration. Passover was and remains a ritual symbolizing their belief that God set them free. It is an archetypal story that speaks to the human experience: from bondage to freedom, from death to life, from vulnerability to strength and back again, through suffering to new life.  Every great world religion has a feast/festival or celebration that marks the cycle of renewal and refreshment, freedom and new identity.

Jesus was formed in the crucible of Passover celebrations. It was a reminder that God’s intent was freedom and life without fear.  He was tempered by the prophets’ words and scarred with the fire of others’ pain.  He lived and laughed and loved after the way of God and showed God to all who would look and listen and follow.

Palm Sunday is a day to think twice about what freedom really is.  Jesus coming into the city suggests that he saw a truth beyond what appeared, underneath what was obvious.  Though he would be arrested later in in the week, this day staked Jesus’ path of freedom that was not measured by the absence of prison bars but by clarity of purpose.

What made Jesus dangerous and powerful is that his heart was undeterred no matter what.  He knew what was waiting for him and he went anyway.  He was unafraid of the consequences of his faithfulness. His words were mirrored in his actions.  He was of one heart and mind; he walked one path.  The only way you get that kind of clarity and resolve is by being faithful to the inner journey.  It is not an act of will; it is what happens in silence, study, prayer and community. 

The image of his steadfastness as we enter this week is a reminder that, if we are really honest, all we do is a reflection of who we are for better or worse, and usually for a whole lot of both. Our lives reveal the best and the worst of what it means to be human.  Our lives reveal the fruits of our inner garden. 

The celebration of Palm Sunday lies not in the palms and cheering crowds but in Jesus’ steely resolve to keep on being who he was and to keep on doing what he was doing. Jesus’ inner journey is a path for us to follow, but in a way that is uniquely our own.  We discover this by reaching in deep and allowing ourselves to listen for God’s whispering presence. 

Moses had a burning bush and that would be nice; but the summons to pilgrimage usually isn’t so obvious.  More likely it will be a thought, a gesture, a surprise, a sense that we should go this way and not that, that we should choose this and not that.  It is a delicate kind of listening. It takes practice.

As we follow Jesus on the inner journey, our feet will not move. This is the journey nurtured in silence, a path discovered through listening.  It is the journey inward…to that place that is not a place but grounds all other places.  This journey will keep us grounded in what we are supposed to do and keep us doing it even when it ceases to be popular. This journey will give us the fortitude and clarity to remain undeterred.  This is how we follow Jesus on the way.